📣 Angela Harder, Director of TA:
I’m thinking out loud, but here’s what came top of mind… First, are you able to narrow in on the common trends or themes in what might be missing from your managers? If there’s a way for you to find some trends, you could then build a manager 101 & focus on some of those trends… you could offer a highly suggested learning session to any of your leaders for professional development. It could be a very simple slide deck, reviewing some of the expectations of a people leader, as well as some of the pitfalls when you’re an early career people manager. Happy to help you craft it if you wanna talk.
Another option would be to explore whether or not you have close relationships with any of the owners’ inner circle… There may be a very calculated way to use them to influence the owners to help them better understand that even in startups, and probably more importantly in startups, professional development and management training is critical to scaling.
Depending on your relationship with people leaders, you could always offer office hours and suggest that if anybody has any people issues that they wanna talk through or role-play that you are happy to be a sounding board.
And lastly, which probably should be firstly… make sure you have some people around you that are your support system… start building your network and your village. Startup HR is a wild ride but also an opportunity to be incredibly impactful as long as you take time to fill your own cup and stay grounded.
📣 Marcy Clawson, HR Manager @ Ka Hale A Ke Ola Homeless Resource Centers:
I'm also fairly new in an HR role but my initial advice would be for you to schedule a weekly (or at least bi-weekly) management/leadership meeting with the managers and owners. Schedule this meeting with a guided agenda in place that you can use to move forward management issues directly with the ownership so they better understand the regularly occurring issues.
These new owners don't know what they don't know and maybe a good start is to have regular communication with their managers and you as the facilitator. They may continue letting you take on the CEO duties if you let them, and I don't say that with any judgement (I feel your pain), so building a strong pipeline of communication between the owners and managers is a great place to start.
📣 Alex White, Regional Director, HR @ Washington Duke Inn & Golf Club:
You’re carrying a heavy load – and from the sound of it, you’ve been put in a position that’s unsustainable long-term. Ownership that’s inexperienced and resistant to feedback is one of the hardest dynamics to manage in a small business.
A few thoughts:
Get Out of the “CEO by Default” Trap:
Right now, you’re doing executive-level work without executive-level authority. That’s not fair, and it’s why you’re burning out. Clarify what is actually your role and what is theirs. If they’re unwilling to step up, at least make clear that those gaps exist and you can’t carry them all indefinitely.
Use Data and Business Impact, Not Just Feelings:
Owners who “think they’re doing great” often need a mirror held up. Show them the cost of inaction – turnover rates, missed deadlines, disengagement scores (if you survey), or even lost revenue opportunities. Tie burnout directly to dollars and business outcomes. It may land better than “the team is tired.”
Start Small – Don’t Try to Fix It All at Once:
Instead of saying, “You both need to manage better,” propose specific, small behaviors:
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Weekly one-on-ones with managers.
- Quarterly check-ins with the team.
- Visibility at all-hands meetings.
Make it bite-sized and concrete. Otherwise, overwhelmed new owners will just freeze.
Frame It as Leadership Development (Not a Critique):
These are young, first-time owners. They probably don’t even realize how much they don’t know. Sometimes reframing it as “leadership development” instead of “you’re failing” gets better traction. Suggest outside coaching, workshops, or even peer networking with other entrepreneurs.
Protect Yourself:
I’ll be blunt: you cannot want this more than they do. If ownership won’t engage, you risk burning yourself out and resenting the whole situation. Keep documenting, set boundaries where possible, and be clear about what’s sustainable for you.
At the end of the day, HR can INFLUENCE, but you can’t force ownership to lead. You can highlight the risks, suggest solutions, and set expectations – but the follow-through has to come from them. If they don’t step into their role, you may have to decide if this is the right long-term fit for you.
You’ve already shown resilience and leadership just by holding things together this long. But remember: being the glue only works if the structure itself is willing to hold. Hope that helps but please feel free to reach out if you want to brainstorm additional ideas/topics.
Enjoy the rest of your day!
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