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Hi ya party people,

Haaappy Friday! Who else has had a banger of a week?! 🥳

Even during good weeks, NO amount of happy meetings or fun Slack debates beats that sweet weekend energy creeping in.

My bed is undefeated.

If this week wasn’t your week? Your weekend relaxation time is almost here, and we’ll fight the good fight again next week. Hang in there.

Okay, this week’s Q&A hits two pressure points we don’t talk about enough: how to actually influence up without feeling like the annoying voice of “culture,” and what happens when you, the HR person, needs HR.

Because yes, sometimes the people who fix the messes…end up in the mess themselves. Let’s unpack both.

And don’t forget to submit your questions for a chance to be featured on a future edition! 👀

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😬 influence & isolation

✍🏾 I'm the People Ops person at a startup & I'm only at Manager level. Do you have any recommendations on getting leaders meaningfully involved in shaping company culture without sounding like a distraction to the "real work"? Any advice for influencing from the middle?

Context: 2 year old startup, in the middle of a VC fundraise, <25 employees, AI

📣 Jenna Barone, Sr. Operations Manager @ Electric Picks:

In a somewhat similar situation, I started collecting data and feedback from employees so i had real data on how culture affects performance (positively and negatively). I started with my team, then slowly rolled out to others; quarterly pulse check feedback is an easy place to start.

Once I started sharing the data with our CEO, they were able to draw the connection between productivity and a positive culture - it's a journey, and patience, positivity, and grit will bring you to success! Good luck 🙂

📣 Dani Herrera, Talent and DEI Consultant @ dei by dani:

Great question! Here are a few things that have worked really well for my clients: I'd recommend connecting culture and team wellbeing directly to performance reviews and performance/engagement in general.

When these initiatives are part of how we evaluate success (not just "nice to have" programs), they get the attention and resources they deserve. I'd also assess managers on their involvement in these initiatives and have their team members weigh in during 360 reviews.

Also, you can make sure your mission and vision statements actually cover these goals.

I have a bunch more ideas on this (it's pretty much what I spend my days working on with clients!), but I didn't want to overwhelm you with a novel, especially if you're a team of one juggling a million things!

📣 Katie Corum, CEO & President @ SOAR HR Consulting, LLC:

I had to quadruple a company in less then 3 years and I was one-woman HR Department. So, I had to think outside of the box and every single detail from front to back of house.

I got creative in my interviewing of candidates and had the Managers and the peers involved in it, I had copied the Hiring Manager, IT, Facilities when getting ready to onboard the new hire, I implemented a mentorship program, created 60-day reviews, etc. And I also implemented a service recognition program and company newsletter.

The more you can have the Manager and peers to feel a part of the process in building the culture and organization, the more they feel that they are providing purpose to their role.

Safe Space members can join this discussion here. Not a member yet? Apply to join here.

✍🏾 Who does HR go to when they need....HR?

Context: I work for a smaller government organization where I am the sole HR employee. I have been back from maternity leave for 2.5 months and last week I was called into management's office and given disciplinary action that basically equates to a "third strike." Almost everything cited in the document I was given is false or was misinterpreted based on hearsay. Keep in mind also that I have never once been approached about any of these concerns nor has there ever been any previous disciplinary action or documented discussions.

Am I wrong to request that this be revised into a lesser punishment after providing evidence of the falsehoods that have been stated? Other employees that have received like disciplinary action have been given prior warnings and counseling so this has left me with my head spinning a bit.

📣 Jenna Barone, Sr. Operations Manager @ Electric Picks:

The positive is as the sole HR person, you have the records of how claims should be filed, etc. I would use the policies and hard evidence (documents, emails, etc) to propose the review of this disciplinary action to ensure you are being treated the same as you treat other employees in these situations.

It's challenging because you are involved but if you can keep it matter of fact and remove emotion, you should be able to showcase the reality of these claims. Best of luck!

📣 Rachel George, Human Resources Business Partner @ Community Care Partners:

Hi, I am really sorry that you are dealing with this.

The timing alone is making me pause. It is not unusual for issues to surface while someone is on leave, especially when others are covering and communication is scattered. Sometimes concerns form without full context, and when the person returns, decisions are made quickly without all the facts. That might be part of what happened here.

Returning and being immediately given a “third strike” level action suggests there may be missing context or premature conclusions. They may also have moved directly to that level because they viewed the concerns as severe, and that could be how they are justifying bypassing the earlier steps in the process.

That said, you are absolutely within your right to ask for a review. If the information in the document is incorrect or incomplete, it is fair to request a revision and an explanation of how the decision was made. I agree with Jenna's response on this post - Keep everything in writing, stay calm and factual, and focus on accuracy and fairness.

You are not overreacting. Wanting fairness and consistency is completely reasonable. I hope you receive clarity soon and that this is resolved in a way that restores your confidence and peace of mind.

📣 Alex White Regional Director, HR at Washington Duke Inn & Golf Club:

First off, I'm sorry to hear you're going through this and you’re absolutely not wrong to question it. HR may be the department of fairness and accountability, but when you are HR, there’s no built-in safety net — and that can make situations like this isolating and disorienting.

A few thoughts:

You have every right to request revision or reconsideration.

If you have credible evidence that the claims are inaccurate or based on hearsay, document it clearly and professionally. Submit a written rebuttal — calm, factual, and supported by dates, emails, and examples. Ask for your statement to be attached to the formal record of the disciplinary action.
Anchor your request in process and precedent.
You’ve already noted that others received progressive discipline before reaching this stage — that’s key. Frame your appeal around consistency and due process, not emotion. For example:

“I understand and respect management’s concerns, but I would like to request a review to ensure consistency with past disciplinary actions and accurate consideration of the facts.”
Loop in your checks and balances.
In a government setting, you may have access to an HR board, civil service commission, or ombuds office. Even if it feels awkward, these are precisely the mechanisms designed to protect employees (especially when HR is the employee in question). If you have legal counsel or access to an employee assistance resource, it might also be worth consulting them.
Keep it above reproach.
You’re understandably emotional — who wouldn’t be? But professionalism here is power. Keep all correspondence measured, thorough, and fact-based. Avoid assigning motive. Your goal is to make the facts undeniable and your tone unimpeachable.
Finally — get yourself some HR.
When you are HR, your “HR” has to come from your network: peers, mentors, professional associations, or even communities like this one. Don’t try to carry it alone. You deserve the same fairness and advocacy you’ve always provided to others.

Safe Space members can join this discussion here. Not a member yet? Apply to join here.

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📝 RESOURCE OF THE WEEK

Each week I feature a resource I love from the Safe Space library that I believe would be relatable to this week's newsletter topic.

This week? 32 behaviors that impact culture. Check it out HERE ⬇️