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Hi ya party people,

Happy Friday! It’s been one of those weeks.

You know, the kind where your calendar looks like Tetris, your inbox is a crime scene, and the only thing holding you together is caffeine and friendship.

Austin last week, NYC this week. It has been a lot, but hey, I can at least say I’m having fun! 🤪

This week’s Q&A features include:

What to do when your associates basically start a coup because they miss their old boss (and it’s not about you, but also…it kind of is).

And second, how to tell your CEO that your project is tanking, not because you suck, but because the budget, client, and resources are all stacked against you. *sigh*

Let’s get into it, shall we?

And as always, if you have any questions that could potentially be featured in the future, you can submit them here!

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ASK AWAY

😬 budgets & bosses

✍🏽 How do you deal with associates that are hateful because you replaced their favorite leader. I am nothing like her, I provide support, like best practices and quick responses to things they need to research so they don't have to do lengthy research, but that doesn't mean doing their job for them. I'm new here and I just need support 🙁

Context: I have learned through witnesses that 2-3 of my associates are filing complains to HR with the intent to get me fired. they are using my tone as uncomfortable as the reason they no longer want to work with me.

One gossiped to me about an executive and put a stop to it, she didn't like it and further down advised her to be less skeptical - HR said that "we cannot quit our associates they have the right to unionize"

The other one has erratic behavior and does not take any feedback well at all. So, any recommendation to point to some area that she needs improvement turnout to a pushback, talk over you and puts you in defensive mode and just ugly. I have learned to either put it in writing or avoid conversation all together. but if it has to be addressed, I always have a witness. This time I brought in my boss to a meeting, and she went ballistic on him.

I am direct but still kind and empathetic.

This is National company but divided through regions. I have interacted with HR who is part of our regional office, and I feel like she takes the associates side more than leader's side. Her advice has always been, "these are our associates, and it is for me as a leader to learn the skills to better collaborate with the 2nd individual.

📣 Rosetta Williams, Sr. Director, People Talent & Culture @ Immigrant Justice Corps:

It’s tough stepping into a role where the team was loyal to a previous leader. A few things that can help:

1. Document interactions (especially when there’s conflict) and keep feedback fact-based.

2. Stay consistent and professional—your credibility grows over time.

3. Set clear expectations up front so conversations are about behaviors, not personalities.

4. Loop in HR strategically by framing concerns around business impact, not just tone.

5. Don’t take hostility personally—much of it comes from resistance to change, not you.

You’re already showing strong awareness by involving witnesses and reflecting on your approach. Keep focusing on consistency and professionalism—it will serve you well long-term.

📣 Stephanie Slysz, Director of People & Culture @ Galvanize USA:

Is your team primarily in-person or remote? If remote, could bringing everyone together in-person for a retreat be valuable? And if you’re already in-person, maybe an offsite could help. Taking time to step back, connect, and better understand how each of you works could reset the tone. An outside facilitator might also help break down barriers and build trust.

Have you considered seeking outside support, like a coach or mentor? What kinds of professional development resources could you tap into? If your company is larger, are there any internal mentorship or development programs available?

I also wish you had more support from HR. Having them help “set the table” with the team (reinforcing that you’re here to stay) could go a long way in helping people turn the page. Is there anyone else you could connect with in HR, or even a peer manager in a similar role? Are there opportunities for team members to shift to a different manager or team if that would help morale?

Finally, are there organizational values (like teamwork or collaboration) that you could point to in conversations about performance? Sometimes grounding feedback in shared values can help frame expectations more clearly.

Wishing you the best of luck — this sounds like a tough spot, but you’re asking the right questions and change takes time.

📣 George Boone, Organizational Effectiveness and Talent Management @ Mitratech:

Where you can - put the KPIs/Projects/General Work aside and do your best to build trust. Be vulnerable - address the tension (start small - not a full on deep dive), "I know you all had a good relationship with your former boss, I would love to get to that level of trust one day, and I know that will take time."

It's not easy to take over a new team, especially if their boss was a favorite - you're fighting an uphill battle.

A few best practices aside from addressing the tension:

Get to know your team - what are their career aspirations, what did their favorite manager do that you can mimic, what do they like to do for fun? Care about the person, not just the about.
Set clear expectations - how do you prefer to be contacted (email, chat, text, etc.)? What are your typical working hours? Do you have a family? What do you do in your free time? Be real, they need to see that you're human (not superhuman). Be a safe space for them - your team is going to mess up, that's OK. How you handle the missteps is going to make a break your relationship with them. You've made mistakes and learned from them to get to where you are today, share your story with them.

Some other tips pulled from Overcoming The Five Dysfunctions of a Team by Patrick Lencioni:

Do a personal histories exercise, example here
Set up meaningful, regular 1x1s with the individuals, again, focus on the person, not just the task. Talk about what is important to them.
Use some sort of personality/working style tool - We use Insights Discovery at Mitratech and helps others connect more easily when it comes to communication and working style.

Last but not least, good luck! Being a manager is hard, but it is a skill that can be grown over time. No matter what people say, there are no born leaders. They've developed those skills and put in the work over the years to get to where they are today.

Safe Space members can join this discussion here. Not a member yet? Apply to join here.

✍🏽 The project I'm managing is losing money due to a combination of it having been underbid, client not cooperating, and my requests for sufficient resources being ignored. How can I explain this to my CEO without sounding like I'm trying to point fingers and not take responsibility?

Context: Small company, 250 people. Biotechnology industry. I'm a new manager.

📣 Alexandra E, CHRO @ Credit Union:

Not to suggest what to say exactly, but presenting, as others have already stated in a direct, non finger pointing way, and assuming the CEO is the right person to discuss this issue with - don’t skip chain of command- using an executive summary method (because CEOs are busy and are usually only half listening)

“I want to flag that [Project] is running at a loss. I take responsibility for how it’s going, and I’ve looked at why: it was underbid from the start, the client has required more work than expected, and we don’t yet have the resources needed to deliver at the current scope.

The impact is pressure on profitability and timelines.

To correct this, I see three options: re-scope with the client, secure more resources, or accept the loss but use this as a lesson to tighten bids and resourcing in the future.

I’d like your guidance on which path makes most sense.”

I think this hits all the highlights and brings the CEO into the decision making process of what happens next, while you learn what to look out for on the next project. The CEO can circle back to any of the points brought up in your “elevator pitch” that need further clarification.

📣 Kimberly Brady, HR Generalist @ HopeTree Family Services:

I’d recommend framing it with ownership, transparency, and solutions.

Start by leading with responsibility: “I want to give you a clear update on Project X. As the project lead, I take responsibility for where we are and want to walk you through the challenges and next steps.”

Then share the facts neutrally (underbid scope, client delays, resourcing limits) without blame. Reframe them as lessons learned (e.g., stronger scoping, earlier client escalation, clearer resourcing process).

Finally, pivot to solutions: outline what you’ll do now (renegotiate scope, adjust deliverables, reallocate resources) and what you’ll change going forward. Close by asking if your plan aligns with goals.

This shows accountability, constructive thinking, and a future focus, instead of finger-pointing 🙂

📣 Adrienne Heaphy-Tenney, Director of Operations @ Engagys:

Agree with Kimberly's post. Framing it as a neutral update with strategic considerations and an "I've got this" approach will position you as a problem solver. Consider including any action you've already taken to mitigate risks and if this is a strategic account for the business, include considerations for the next engagement such as internal process improvements, pricing / staffing adjustments, etc.

Further, don't lose sight of the team that is working hard to make this project a success. Maybe part of your conversation is around something to help the team stay motived and feel valued under tough conditions. A shout out from the CEO can go a long way if it's not already an embedded part of your culture.

🚨 ON YOUR RADAR

🎧 Being “the only” at work is as isolating as it is exhausting. I sat down with Amina Gass to unpack the invisible weight underrepresented folks carry, from microaggressions to the constant pressure to represent an entire group. Check it out on Spotify or Apple Podcasts!

🤔 Skills tests or behavioral assessments: what actually predicts success? eSkill breaks it all down in a new article, showing why technical skills tests are the stronger predictor of performance! Behavioral assessments still have their place, but only when they’re used to complement (not replace) the hard skills that drive results!

⚙️ If your tech stack feels like a Jenga tower that could collapse any second, listen up! The next HR Therapy is all about messy tools and messier workarounds. Come for the commiserating, leave with actual next steps!

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📝 RESOURCE OF THE WEEK

Each week I feature a resource I love from the Safe Space library that I believe would be relatable to this week's newsletter topic.

This week, breaking down where the responsibility for culture lies!. Check it out HERE ⬇️